BEING A BIG THINKER

I certainly understand why. When we are young, parents and teachers tell us we can do anything and become whatever we want. But as we grow older, these same people tell us we must be more realistic.

Pretty soon, their collective voices becomes The Voice in our head. As soon as we have a big thought, we check ourselves: C’mon. Get real. That will never happen. You have to be more realistic. And so it goes. We mistake this for wisdom.

That was the mindset I had until I picked up The Magic of Thinking Big by David Schwartz, Ph.D. This book was originally published in 1959. I read it for the first time in the late 80s. It forever changed my approach to life and work.

Since that time, I have become convinced that thinking big is not a gift, but a skill—one that anyone can develop. It starts by understanding the process and then consistently practicing it.

Here are seven steps to thinking big:

1. Imagine the possibilities. Give yourself permission to dream. I remember doing this when I was writing my first book. I imagined what it would be like to be a bestselling author. I thought about what it would be like to see my book on the New York Times best sellers list.
2. Write down your dream. This is the act that transforms a dream into a goal. Amazing things happen when you commit something to writing. I don’t fully understand how it works, but I have experienced it first-hand again and again. The phenomenon is explained in a very compelling book by Henriette Klauser called Write It Down, Make It Happen.
3. Connect with what is at stake. This is your rationale. Unfortunately, it is a crucial step that people often omit. Before you can find your way, you must discover your why. Why is this goal important to you? What will achieving it make possible? What is at stake if you don’t? What will you lose? Your rationale provides the intellectual and emotional power to keep going when the path becomes difficult (which it will).
4. Outline what would have to be true. Rather than merely asking how to get from where you are to where you want to go (strategy), I like asking what would have to be true for my dream to become a reality. For example, when I set a goal of hitting the best sellers list, I realized that I would have to write a compelling book, become its chief spokesperson, get major media exposure, etc. I started with the dream and worked backwards.
5. Decide what you can do to affect the outcome. This is where you transition from the big picture to daily actions. This is where people often get derailed. They can’t see all the steps that will take them to their goal. So rather than doing something, they do nothing. You will never see the full path. The important thing is to do the next right thing. What can you do today to move you toward your dream?
6. Determine when this will happen. Someone once said that a goal is simply a dream with a deadline. A deadline is one way to make the dream more concrete—which is exactly what thinking big is about. A deadline also creates a sense of urgency that will motivate you to take action. Force yourself to assign a “by when” date to every goal. (If you get stuck, ask yourself, What’s the worst that can happen if I don’t hit this?)
7. Review your goals daily. When I was writing my first book, I reviewed my goals daily. I prayed over them. I determined what I needed to do today to make them a reality. It gave me a laser focus, especially when the dream looked impossible—when the publisher called to cancel the contract, when my publicist told me no one was interested in the book, when the publisher ran out of inventory right after the book hit the best sellers list.

Don’t listen to that mocking little voice that tells you to be more realistic. Ignore it. You can either accept reality as it is or create it as you wish it to be. This is the essence of dreaming—and thinking big.

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CHANGE YOUR LIFE STORY

Before attending important meetings, I would wear two t-shirts, hoping that I wouldn’t sweat through both. I strategically selected my clothing, based on which colors would show the least amount of perspiration.

I would also step into the bathroom right before the meeting began, and frantically run hot water over my hands. I would then dry them vigorously, praying that they would warm up. Idreaded having to shake hands with anyone.

At some point, I realized that the problem was not in my body, but in my head. I was telling myself a bad story. Mine went like this:

You are too young for this job. Worse, you don’t have the experience. Who do you think you are fooling? It’s just a matter of time before everyone in the company sees it. When that happens, you will be out on the street—right where you should have been all along.

I would never say this out loud, of course. It was just the sound-track that was playing inside my head.

Things didn’t change until I became aware of the story and took control of the narrative. I started telling myself a different story.

I think almost every problem we experience can be traced back to the stories we tell ourselves. There may be a good reason for these stories, but in the end they produce bad outcomes.

It comes down to this: Change your story, change your life.

Let me suggest five ways to take control of the narrative in your head:

1. Recognize the voice in your head. It doesn’t matter where it is coming from (your parents, a teacher, an abusive spouse); just recognize that it is happening.
2. Jot down what the voice is saying. It might be something like:
   • “You’re too young.”
   • “You’re too old.”
   • “You’re uneducated.”
   • “You’re over-educated.”
   • “You don’t have enough experience.”
   • “You don’t have the right experience.”

   This could be literally anything. Listen carefully and write it down word-for-word.

3. Evaluate whether this story is empowering. Is it enabling you to accomplish the outcomes you want or is it preventing you from doing so. Be honest. (Sometimes, people are addicted to their problems and the stories that create them.)
4. Write down a different story. I’m not talking about a bunch of positive thinking mumbo jumbo. I am talking about telling yourself the truth. And often, this is simply a matter of shifting your perspective.
5. Start telling yourself the new story. Every time your inner narrator begins telling the old yarn, stop him. Say, “No! That’s baloney. Here’s the truth.” Then repeat your new story.

Once I realize that this is what had happened to me, I crafted a new story. Mine went like this:

Yes, you are young. That gives you tremendous energy. You also don’t have a lot of experience, which is why it is easier for you to think outside the box. God has provided everything you need to be successful in this situation. Even if you fail, you will learn something from it. You can’t lose; you can only quit. And you most certainly are not a quitter!

This changed everything for me. It didn’t happen overnight, but more quickly than I expected. The physical symptoms gradually disappeared. Now, instead of focusing on the behavior I want to change, I focus on the story I am telling myself.

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LEADING REMOTELY

This is a guest post by Michael Sliwinski. He is the founder of the time and project-management application Nozbe (the task manager I use) and editor-in-chief of Productive! Magazine.

I love my complicated situation. I lead an Internet company based in Poland (Central Europe). Most of our team is located there, with one person in Germany, collaborators in the USA and Japan—and me in Spain. And our customers are all over the world. Leading a company like this is complex but rewarding.

We all work from home. It’s our lifestyle choice. Everyone works the way they want, at the time they want. It gives us all lots of freedom, but it also requires a tremendous amount of focus—and great leadership skills from me. I’m learning as I go, reading this blog every day as well as every leadership book I can find. I’m also a GTD (Getting Things Done) aficionado and this helps, too.


Here are five best practices I’ve learned so far about leading a team remotely:


1. Schedule weekly reviews. In his best seller, Getting Things Done book, David Allen highlights the importance of the 'Weekly Review,' a meeting we should schedule with ourselves to review our past week and prepare for the next one. This is indispensable for ensuring that I am focused and on-task.

Although we’re a small team, my first two team members, my Chief Technology Officer and Customer Service manager, are responsible for day-to-day management of their teams. That’s why every Monday I do an hourly Weekly Review with each of them. This helps us stay focused, summarize last week, and set priorities for the next one.

2. Host a weekly “All-Hands” meeting with the entire team. Every Thursday afternoon we call in for an hour-long conference call where everyone shares how their week has gone so far. This bonds the team and lets everyone know what’s going on. We can also ask questions and just chat. We actually look forward to these meetings every week.

3. Schedule my time strategically. This is really important. Without this you can find yourself being in response-mode all day long, so I decided to divide my day into two parts:

-Before noon is my creative time. My e-mail application is closed. I don’t schedule any phone calls. I work on our strategy, vision, and product. I also write articles, even code a prototype of an app if needed. No distractions, only my work. And sometimes a run or exercise.

-After noon is my responsive time. Now I open my e-mail and get it to “inbox zero”. I prepare feedback for my team, schedule phone calls, interviews, brainstorming sessions, I’m all “at my team’s disposal” now.

4. Communicate through online collaboration apps. We use apps like Dropbox, Google Docs, Socialcast, and our own project-management application to communicate through these tools instead of e-mail. This way everyone is on the same page as to what is going on in the company and on what we all should be working on. E-mail is great, but it wasn’t built for online collaboration. There are better tools.

5. Embrace the fact that control is good, but trust is better. The Germans are fond of saying, “Trust is good, but control is better” I’d say it’s the other way round. Trust is key. I’m trusting my team to do a great job, and I’m doing my best to help them. If someone doesn’t deliver, sooner or later you’ll notice. It’s hard not to. People also work better when they know you trust them.

As a bonus, once a year we meet for a retreat. We all fly to some nice place to spend a week together. We dedicate around three to four hours a day talking about work and bonding and the rest of the time relaxing. These retreats help us get to know one another on a different level and recharge batteries.

I’m also traveling a lot, so whenever I’m close to someone from my team, I try to make sure we meet, eat lunch, or grab a cup of coffee. We need this in-person contact with one another.

Leading a team remotely is challenging, but it is also rewarding. With the technology currently available—and a little intention—it is very doable.

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